Complexities Vs Simplicities ... of the mind!

This is the post I mentioned I was gonna write. Where do I begin? I’ve had loads of bad days with a few good ones thrown in. I have never been this confused and frustrated and more so confused about the cause of my frustration. That’s prolly why it’s taken me weeks to resurface after my exams. May has been fairly eventful for loads of reasons, right after my last post I had our farewell contributory party, finally got a reason to get dressed and party :P. ‘Twas loads of fun and dance but we all knew that it’ll be a long time before we can have a reunion. Then on 8th we had the university final year CSE project competition. Redoin the presentation, preparing and all of that took time but it all paid off in the end and we secured the second position. I swear it felt really good especially since we weren’t expecting it. I just wanna say that C-14 comprising of Doli, Kartik, Rajat and Me has been the best team ever. I’ve loved working with you guys. 9th again all of us met up for Lov and ...

This post is dated Sunday, 3rd May 2009 10:55am Goodbyes are always sad What can be happy about realizing that what you thought was your whole life was just a slice of the pie that, which was gobbled up by the cat last night and now all you're left with is its place on the plate. I hate when things disperse like pieces of paper pinned in different corners never to form a whole page again, of stories, moments and memories. As I turn the date wheel on my calendar I realise that the days gone by, though never forgotten will never come back A scary thought, it is kinda like beginning my life anew the difference being that this time, it won't comprise of YOU ! 11:07am Yesterday was the last day of life as I knew it and today is the first day of the rest of my life. I had my last practical exam yesterday, my last day in college and besides the odd hour before my viva in the morning the entire day was heavy like dust suspended in air. I know I'm prolly still gonna see my friends a...

30th January 2009 4:35 am मेरी हँसी मुझे लौटा दो वापस कर दो मेरी खुशी आख़िर कब तक मैं यूँही ज़िन्दगी से रूठी रहूंगी ? अब खामोशी का क्या है मकसद? मैं जवाब माँगती हूँ... कुछ तोह कहो, कड़वा ही सही दिल मेरा सह लेगा फिर से... The first hindi post on my blog, funny i didn't know how to use transliteration before :P PS: More published - Read my science arti here and Durjoy 's interview here .

Appended to Penwork 21st Jan 2009, 12:13am Picture a well, once full of water, the source of life... many gathered around to share their hopes and joys, their fears and sorrows; now all dried up drained, empty and hollow with nothing to offer only memories for nostalgic fools nothing to celebrate nothing to experience nothing to cherish Resigned to fate the well ponders... Someone must end this numb existence someone must fill it up with water, with love. 12:23am PS: Something about the well analogy really intrigues me.

31st Dec 08 3:25am "The thread" Small but important lean but powerful the thread difficult and intangible when all knotted up an incredible support when circled all around You are the thread in my life You tie and keep me together And I fall apart like wreckage when you're not around Tie around me a permanent knot so you can't escape and I'm always secure. 3:30am 15th Jan 09 1:36am "Bring it on" I dare you to make me cry I dare you to break me down I dare you to crush my pieces I dare you to ruin my peace I dare you to make me bleed I dare you to test my patience I dare you to forget me I dare you to kill me everyday Go ahead, bring it on! 1:40am PS : Happy New Year everyone... :) Oh and btw I got published !! :D No No not a book, just an article, please read here .

There again I was busy getting bored outta my head when I didn't absolutely have to study for my exams, watching movies, reading silly romance novels back to back, maybe coz atleast there I'm guaranteed a happy ending... all this while I really should have been getting back to the place I love... here !! Okay obviously all of u have noticed the url change and the fact that you weren't informed immediately... well lets just say that I couldn't afford to be discovered that easily anymore. I've got loads of stuff to say, about whats been happenin in my life but its just a lil too overwhelming to spill that much information so I'm gonna go slow... The MOVE referred to in "Dos" didn't happen on 20th Oct, it got postponed to Wednesday, 22nd and thats when I realised that exactly nothing goes according to plan when you have every reason to believe it will. Murphy's law at its best in live demonstration! Something I penned on 18th, the same day the in...

I live in a beautiful house walls colored in magenta, aqua, yellow, blue and ebony candles on the mantle with flames of hope flicker in the wind pictures of my dreams adorn those painted walls I've loved being indoors bein in my comfortable palace then one day... I heard a tap on my window one that I couldn't ignore Looked out for the first time to see an eagle swoop down on shards of broken glass Not a pleasant sight but I couldn't look away I realize the eagle's meaning only a lil too late I've been here long enough looking out won't do I need to open the door the door to reality The eagle is waiting I need to step out and walk on the wreckage I know it will hurt my delicate feet and i'm frozen at the thought But I will carry myself through I maybe numbed by the pain but the agony is about to begin! PS: Appended to Penwork, 1:10am

Addition to Penwork 3:45am 12th August 08 I know there would come a time when I would hate my existence. There would come a time when I would despise my foolishness. There would come a time when I would crave for a companion. And even though I'm terrified of such a time, I know... that I will not regret havin lived in the beauty of love. PS: Why does God decide to fulfill our wishes just when we've realized that we were wishing for the wrong thing?? Default Image Credits : deviantART

This post was typed on my phone earlier in the day, is making its way to my blog now! I got tagged by Solitaire first and later Pri to write 6 random things about the moment that I was living in, I chose 9:20am this morning (12th March 08), so here goes... I'm sitting on the metro floor quite unlike myself...absolutely silent. I wish I didn't have to go to college today. The sky outside is a brilliant color...reminds me of how badly i need a break. It's very irksome that some of my friends are paying no heed to the fact that eatin is not allowed on the train. I might not get my prac attendance after all...the only reason why I literally dragged myself outta bed this morning...life just couldn't get any better! I'm really missin you...I can't deal with this anymore...I need you now. Another lil something I scribbled today... 12th March 08 5:45pm Silent suffering is what I'm goin through... Harder than I thought it would be... The harsh reality is unpalatabl...

Wrote this yesterday in Mango's deathly boring networks lecture... {Mango is what we call our prof. coz his initials are MNG :P}, hope u like it! 10th March 08 1:35pm "Keeping the Faith" The universe conspires against me Tossed around amidst tides of loneliness Groping to hold onto a speck of comfort Struggling to maintain the curve of my smile Calling SOS for my Saviour Hoping to hold on just a lil more There I feel a familiar touch He has arrived, to rescue me Churning in the deepest pits of my stomach, a lump in my throat I know I will live... Live to see the sun, Live to dream again Live to relearn to smile !

8th February 08 3:39 to 3:57 am This dark and dainty life of mine lights up like the moon when you come and wipe off all the gloom. You always go and find my smile when ive lost it in the woods near the bushes of fear or the lake of uncertainty, by the creek of sadness or by the stream of tears. You bring hope and meaning along with my smile no matter you've to tread how many a mile. You're the best thing to have happened to me and I will treasure you till the end of my time. I know its pretty rough but i couldn't improve much in my sleep, lemme know what you think. Image credits: deviantART

"the song that makes me cry you who makes me smile the rain that reminds me of u the drops i feel go within me my heart that beats harder whenever i hear your voice wishin each day for ur happiness and in turn mine wishing each day for my sanity read wishin for u by my side i feel like i live my life with u and theres just no other way to do it" Just penned this down, its not a poem, not a paragraph...just some fragmented sentences...make sense?

Okay was in bed early today...dunno what happened i got up to switch on the light and picked up my pencil to write the following... Maybe you'll never look into my eyes and say what i so badly want to hear Maybe we won't be so close yet another year after year Maybe things would change and we would be more far than near But... and then i strangely blanked out!!! {This was 10 minutes ago} Can someone try and complete this.. ?

[Appended to Penwork] 29th April 7:28pm I know so little Yet it hurts so much I know it stings Yet I love so much The hardest thing I know I have to do is Walk Away ..., Never to return I begin today to drift away. God I don't wanna care I don't wanna feel anymore I wanna be numb forever I wish I'd be indifferent Indifferent to pain Indifferent to the world around me Never again to shed a tear Shed all I have left today. God help me follow through Let me be strong, stronger than this, way stronger than this !!! 29th April 7:35pm PS: I was gonna disable comments on this post ... but as an after thought here's what I'm gonna do... u can comment on it... but I won't be recommenting on this particular post. Thanks for your cooperation in advance !

This is something i just finished writin .... 1:08 to 1:18am Life is a perennial tragedy Just when alls well something just has to go wrong which causes all the more pain and misery I'm tired of seeking as you run and hide I'm tired of waiting only letting out a deep sigh I'm tired of looking at the tide go low and high My bird of dreams soaring in my hopes' sky Its time now to let you go Its time now to cease her flight Its time again to resume solitude coz life is... a perennial tragedy !

15th Feb 2007 3:43pm to 3:47pm Flowers wilt Fragrances fade Colours pale Smiles dissolve Dreams disappear Hopes subside Thoughts haze Mist clears What remains is ... Me sans everything sans you !

1) my very first few lines 8th may hey guys i really dunno where this came from.......bas lightning struck right now and i wrote this Humne na socha tha kabhi tum dil mein yun bas jaoge itna paas hoge ki dil ki dhadkan bhi chu jaoge kya pata tha aisa hoga ki tum na bhi kaho toh bhi hum .... jeete hue bhi mar jayenge!!! 2)another one 8th may-- ok i really dunno what has happened to me. ..........but heres something else i came up with in the past 10 minutes ppl i swear this is impromptu and totally out of the blue so plz bear with me if u cant make head or tail of what i'm talking abt here it goes: Love is something that makes u sing When you're in love every word has a different ring. His smile makes u wanna die Oh! how u wish your eyes cud lie they give every secret of urs away esp when he asks you for a dance and hand in hand both of u sway Man! is this love??? you ask yourself you don't need to hear it his touch has lots to say. Give yourself in Let yourself loose and y...