Fighting Tears…of desperation
For all who don’t know the reason for my sudden sabbatical lemme tell you I can’t quite figure out myself. :-/
As I write this down I’m sittin in our half unpacked house {I haven’t yet gotten to callin it ‘home’, and yes there is a difference} with no access to the internet, no television, pathetic electricity situation and living with an enormous distance from everything I call my life.
Sounds bad? It’s worse…
I’ve been here since Tuesday night, and there hasn’t been one night that I’ve slept properly without shedding a few silent tears {sometimes more than a few}.
You know the scrabble alphabets? Well just picture all of them in a box that has been shaken vigorously and then toppled and emptied…that’s exactly how all of my life’s letters have fallen out of place; each day has become a farrago.
I don’t know how to really say how I feel. But if I can put it in words it would be depression from loneliness…
Can’t even write further, it’s hard to explain. I only hope this mess called my life sorts out soon before I go insane.
PS: The internet just got connected but I can’t make it wireless for some strange reason, therefore you’ll get to read this post sooner than I had thought.
Comments
waiting for u to get back...missing u loads!
p.s: i was hoping for more pics of the new house :)
Take care..love n missing ya lods
Y lonely? U have ur family.. ok... If ur stil not convinced, sweety... cell?? Thts with u.. Ur frnds r with u. We can tlk through msgs if not on a cal whnevr ur feelin low. toh phir dar kis baat ka?
Look @ d positive sides na buddhu :P
lv yaa
but anyways gal...take care n dont cry...
cal ur frnds n!!!!:) dont worry! ok!
n u can always talk to me:)..anytime of the day oh i mean night! im eternally vella n u knw tht!
love u loads>:D<
why are u lonely?? moved in a new place is it?
and dont worry...just get the internet connected and we are all just a click away...whenever u need us :)
and heyy dont get the smile off ok?...ever!
*love and smiles*
yes ure right iam pretty much alone right now, im sure u'll do all u can and i need that too
im kinda back ... missed u a hell lot!
@ps...this pic is not of my house, its the lonely poppy in tanuj's garden :P, and im not interested in posting pics of the 'new house'
@cheri
im holding on, the only thing i can do really!...
love ya and miss ya too :-*
yeah i do have them, but the loneliness comes from being away from everything else... aaj internet laga hai woh bhi badi mushkil se
im alright ... love u too sweets >:D<
@neha
why am i in sucha house? well lonnng story but we had to be in it since mum and dad built it and its bigger than where were stayin previously...
these problems can be sorted but its more complicated than it seems.
thanks a ton, i'll be okay its just a matter of when...
i know you are...met with my sunshine today too, so im much better :)
i love u for being there...hugs!!!
@pri
bata toh rahi hoon, i'm lonely coz i moved to a new place which is very far and i didnt have a choice
i did get the internet connected today finally after 6 days but its still not working wirelessly {i cant figure out why}
thanks for being there ... love that feeling pri
:)
*love...*
yeah initially moving always sucks ...only this time its a lot more complicated and mixed up.
@Sam
faridabad...but im comin back to delhi sooner than i thought :)
You will go through it :)
And your friends are always there, you know this :)
Take good care!!
Good luck with oncoming exams, sweets!
this sounds bad
but now the net is on again.. I am sure u'll feel better
just take care and all don't worry abt the pieces of your life.. they have a knack of alway falling back in place :)
cheer up
*a biiiiiiiiiiiiiig Bear Hug*
I know how it feels.
Hang in there.
Its a phase. You are at the beginning. I am at the end.
But it will pass.
i know i sure have great ppl {all my frnds} to count on for gettin through anything :)
thanks dear... am gonna start studyin today :P
@sherry
hehe u sounded so cute, ure right its better atleast bearable with the net... and plus im goin back!!! :D
*bear hug* right back at ya
:)
mez hanging ... and mine's gonna pass real soon... i'm goin back!
hugs!
PS: its just so nice to know u understand and im not alone :)
as i always say.. "Pain and journey never ends...its just tat u have to forget it, begin a new chapter, take a new path, thinking of another journey..."
Life will give u the best also, so dont worry and everything will be fine.
Just dont get into the deep thoughts of pessimism so that it would be difficult later to stand up, and u then have to run hard to catch and get hold of life.
Cheers... and wish u all the good luck.
things will be better soon!!!
Amen!!! :)
n hope u get outta mess and get all stff settled!!
:)
hey thanks a lot for all the wishes, and i surely am not gettin into pessimism...thats pretty anti me
will be back to life in full form really soon :)
@jaggu
thanks dear... i really appreciate all the support u guys offer, its really nice. :)
yeah u know, and who better than u... ure the only one who's seen my place.
and yes i did move around, not walk but drive :D
im moving back tomorrow so im all chi'd up :)....only now i need to go and study for exams...
all the best to u too
love...
@Standbymind
lets hope i can do it today... really not in the mood though, very irritated with the settings i need to tamper with.
im moving back tomorrow so that'll be settled...
thanks :)
tc! :)
yeah well it was gonna take quite a while before i cud call it "home" but i cudnt wait, i'm back to my old place and im relieved if not anything else.
abt being excited ... i'll be honest i wasnt excited coz i didnt wanna move at all.
u take care too :)
hmmm its not moving as of now... exams from tomorrow so i'm here and not moving back or anywhere till my semester ends on may 16th.
uske baad...i genuinely have no clue where im gonna be.
don't worry baby
in a while u'll be all settled in
and then u'll grow to love this place as much as your old home
so cheer up and give it a chance
by the way,
I am holding a little party in my shoutbox tomorrow
A great way to have fun and get to know other bloggers.. food, booze, dance and loads and loads of gappein :D
for oodles of masti and bucketsful of fun be there!!!
for timings check my blog
http://sherryrowl.blogspot.com/
and yes, invite as many of your blogger friends as you can..
spread the word!!!
hope to see you guys in my shoutbox tomorrow!!
take care :)
love
sherry
New here but loved ur blog....cool place so I'll be visiting regularly :D
Life has it's complexities but I hope you can fight them bravely
Keep smiling :p
oh u wanna know how the fight is goin ;)... well chk updates for that, will write a new post after my exams...
im doin pretty ok as of now :)
thanks for dropping by
@sherry
im back home sherry atleast till this sem ends on may 16th...so alls well abhi ke liye :)
baad ki baad mein dekhenge
and did i hear party??? yaar networks ke paper se pehle hi rakhni thi :( but koi gal nahi assi phir vi aavange... hehe will be there for the gappein :D
rocking idea this...:)
hi there... thanks so much for visiting :)
im glad u like my space, feels good
i'll be lookin forward to seein u here more often
take care...
everything will obviously get all in lpac and well.... dnt cry baba! it sure is not that bad!!!!!!!!
why did yu move.. whats up? and hw come yu r ALONE? yu dnt have roomies?
he cheer up Vands... we r jus a click away :)
drop in and i will always be read to help :)
where r u by the way?
thanks dear!
@veens
hey welcome here...
abt ur comment ... thank u so much, it made me smile and i think i answered most of ur questions in my latest post...:)
i sure will drop by and thats why i'm gonna blogroll u :)
thanks Sam...
shifting ke final scene ke liye latest post padho...:P
16th may tak ghar pe hi hoon.
oh and thanks for the tag...will chk urs in a bit.:)
yes they are...
hugs right back at ya :)